How to talk to children about war

HARLINGEN, Texas (ValleyCentral) — With the United States involvement with the conflicts between Israel and Iran, the question always comes up “Are we going to war?”

When a child asks the question, we often want to protect them from what is happening.

How do we answer them?

Lately, social media is blowing up with war memes and satire on the idea of the U.S. going to war after tensions rose when the U.S. attacked Iran this weekend.

In this social media driven world, it is most likely some parents will have open conversations on war and political tensions.

In Harlingen, two moms said they are ready to have just that– a war talk.

“Explain to them that sometimes there are conflicts,” said Luisa Ramirez while hugging one of her kids at a splash pad on Tuesday. “And there are consequences to conflicts.”

Ramirez is the mom of two toddlers.

“You don’t want them to be scared, when going to sleep at night or thinking like what is going to happen,” said Ramirez. “I have to be sensitive when explaining things to my children.”

Meanwhile, Diedra Mireles was recently told by her 15-year-old son that he’d be willing to serve the country if he was old enough.

Mireles said her teen brought up the conversation and said there was no use in avoiding it.

“He talks about it more than I do,” said Mireles. “I just say let’s leave it in God’s hands and live day by day.”

Mental health expert Marco Treviño said there’s no cheat code on how to have a war talk at home.

“War is a very complex topic,” said Treviño. “Especially, when we are talking to children. It is always very important to understand and assess where they are at.”

Treviño has some suggestions if you want to have the conversation but don’t know where to start. 

“Start with giving them an opportunity to share what they know,” said Treviño. “And then guide your conversations moving forward, providing a very empathetic standpoint normalizing their emotions.”

Other tips from Treviño include avoiding any alarming or graphic conversations and reminding your child or teens that the war is not in the U.S. He said it is imperative to stay in the present time. 

As for the two moms, they said they are taking it one day at a time and anchoring down on their faith.

“Whenever he’s afraid or something is going wrong,” said Ramirez. “He says can we pray? Can we talk to God.”